It is indeed time to celebrate the festive season of Diwali 2023 with sweets and balloons. Wishing you and your loved ones the most joyous and blessed Diwali till date!

Thoughtful Thought

“What you learn is education. What you implement is wisdom.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“Nothing wears off, because as long as you think differently, you will feel differently.”- Richard Bandler

One Minute NLP – If or When

What is the difference between these two statements?

“You will get complimentary access to my NLP program if you read this newsletter till the end.”

“You will get complimentary access to my NLP program when you read this newsletter till the end.”

Allow your mind to process both these sentences independently and notice the difference it creates in your internal representations. Semantically the only difference is the change of the word from IF to WHEN. Yet the difference that makes the difference in the mind can be phenomenal.

The word IF denotes that a condition subject to which the outcome may or may not happen. The word WHEN denotes that the outcome is more likely to happen anyway – it is just a matter of time.

Now think about how this applies in your day-to-day self-talk. What are you telling yourself: 

A. “I will achieve success if I work hard” OR

B. “I will achieve success when I work hard”

Are you telling yourself:

A. “If I ask the right questions, I will get my answers.” OR

B. “When I ask the right questions, I will get my answers.”

What follows “IF” is considered by the subconscious mind as optional or conditional. What follows “WHEN” is considered by the subconscious mind as certain and doable.

Meta-Magic – Be a Remarkable Pencil

A pencil-maker was once heard giving profound life-lessons to his newly made pencil. “Before you go out to the world, I want to share with you three lessons. When you follow all three, you shall be a remarkable pencil:

Lesson 1: With time, you may become blunt, and you will need the sharpener. You may feel a bit of pain while being sharpened, but it will always make you better.

Lesson 2: You will get the opportunity to correct the mistakes of others. Sometimes you can strike through and do it. At other times, you’ll need the help of an eraser. Put aside your ego and never hesitate in taking help.

Lesson 3: No matter on what surface you go, make sure you leave your mark.”

My question to you is: Which of these three life-lessons are you going to apply today?

Hook From The Book

“A situation in itself is neither happy nor unhappy. It’s only your response to it that causes your sorrow.”– Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni, The Palace of Illusions

Movie Motivation

“Jab tak zinda hoon, tab tak mara nahi… Jab mar gaya, sala main hi nahi.” (Translated to: “Till I am alive, I am not dead… Once I am dead, I am no longer there”) This seemingly casual remark from the movie Anand is a message that reinforces – Live this moment while you are alive, because when you are gone, nothing really matters.

Please do reply to this email – What message does this dialogue convey to you?

This Week’s Winning Post

What is Empathy?

PS: In the One-Minute NLP section above, I mentioned that “You will get complimentary access to my NLP program WHEN you read this newsletter till the end.” I am glad to share with you that here it is:

Here is your opportunity to attend the “first weekend” of the 5-weekend NLP Practitioner Course at absolutely no charge. You can register at the link here right now: http://www.learnnlp.in/

See you next week!

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Often a push to move forward comes from a few words of wisdom. Presenting here is the link to your 2nd edition of Thoughtfully Yours – 99 Thought-Provoking Quotes with Actionable Questions

Thoughtful Thought

“Self-doubt is the wind which blows off the lamp of success.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“There are all kinds of things we can do in this world to make it a better place, but we must start with ourselves.”- Richard Bandler

One Minute NLP – Leave your BUT’s behind

How often have you experienced a self-talk in these words?

“I want to read, but I am not able to find time.”

“I have time, but I am not focused.”

“I am working on myself, but nothing seems to work.”

How do the above sentences make you feel? For most people, these would sound limiting and disempowering.

Now, have a look at these sentences:

“I cannot find time, but I want to read.”

“I might not be focused, but I have the time.”

“I may not feel immediate results, but I am working on myself.”

How do these second set of sentences make you feel? For most people, these sentences do ignite some optimism.

What changed? Just a few words re-arranged? Well, it may look that simple. The answer lies in the impact of the word “BUT”. The word “BUT” has a deeper psychological impact of cancelling out or negating what was said before the word “BUT”. The word “BUT” played its role very effectively in both the set of sentences.

In the first set of sentences, “BUT” cancelled out the effect of the desired outcomes and projected the obstacles. In the second set of sentences, “BUT” cancelled out the effect of the obstacles and projected the focus on the outcomes.

This is just a sample of how language influences your mind. What you say to yourself and others affects your outcome. That’s where NLP becomes your magic wand to work on how to say what you say so that it works well for your and others’ growth.

Meta- Magic – Finding Your Balloon

In a training workshop on conflict resolution for 50 employees of an organisation, the trainer asked each participant to blow a balloon and write their name on it. Once all were done, the trainer took all the balloons and scattered them in another room. He then asked the participants to walk into that room and challenged them to find the balloon with their name in five minutes.

After five minutes, only eight participants had found their balloons while the rest were still in the midst of utter chaos bumping into each other.

The trainer now announced the next round. This time, he made 10 teams of 5 participants, and asked the group to search for the balloons having the names of the group members. All the 10 teams found all the balloons in less than 4 minutes this time.

My Question To You is: Whose help can you seek in finding your balloon?

Hook From The Book

“Stuff your eyes with wonder, he said, live as if you’d drop dead in ten seconds. See the world. It’s more fantastic than any dream made or paid for in factories.”- Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

Movie Motivation

“Even the smallest person can change the course of the future.” This dialogue from the movie The Lord of The Rings reminds us not to limit ourselves, and to instead realise our capability of making the change in our life by being in the Victor mode or the Cause mode at all times.

This Week’s Winning Post

The Pyramid of Healing

See you next week!

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

What if you were to get a further discount to the already discounted ticket to the Global NLP Summit 2024? Yes, you can use the coupon code Mehernosh10 to register. Here is the link: www.globalnlpsummit.com

Thoughtful Thought

“The ride from ‘off-course’ to ‘ofcourse’ is known as self-discovery.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“The reason people have problems is that they have too much time to think.”- Richard Bandler

One Minute NLP – Association

Thanks for your response to my last week’s newsletter where I asked you this question – What do you think where can you use associated ways of recalling and where can you use dissociated ways of recalling?

Now that you know that the Association-based recall has more intense emotional experience than Dissociation-based recall, here is the way to utlise this awareness. 

The memories that are connected to pleasant or more empowering emotions can be recalled using the Association method. To recall a happy memory, experience it as if it is happening right now around you. The same method can be used also when you wish to recreate the emotions of confidence, high energy, courage, or even just peace and calm. These are the moments that we use when we wish to “anchor” these powerful states within us.

On the other hand, memories that are connected to unpleasant or more disempowering emotions can be processed using the Dissociation method, as if you were watching it like a movie. Examples of such memories may include past failures, moments of weakness, phobias or even trauma. While we may not ideally prefer to create such recall, sometimes we may choose to revisit these instances with the intention of imbibing some learnings for ourselves. The NLP process to cure phobias makes use of the dissociative method.

Meta- Magic – What Push are you waiting for?

A King was anxious about finding the right groom for his beautiful daughter, who would also be the right suitor to take the reins of his kingdom. On the behest of one of his courtiers, he announced a challenge – The Princess’ groom would be the one who successfully crosses the river full of crocodiles.

Though the news spread like a wild fire, no one was courageous enough to put their life at stake and cross the deadly river full of crocodiles. Yet, on the announced date, the whole village gathered to see who would have mustered up the courage.

Suddenly there was a splash in the water, and a Prince was seen crossing the river. He swam as frantically as he could and finally made it to the other end. Panting and puffing, he came out and was garlanded by the King who announced his victory.

The perplexed Prince finally spoke after some time. “Who pushed me inside?”

A saint who was standing there came forward smiling, “Son, it doesn’t matter who pushed you. What matters is that you were pushed for the right cause and you made it. If you hadn’t been pushed, you could not have made it the way you did.”

My Question to you is: In which areas of your life, are you waiting to be pushed?

Hook From The Book

“A situation in itself is neither happy nor unhappy. It’s only your response to it that causes your sorrow.”- Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni, The Palace of Illusions

Movie Motivation

“Where are you?” 

“Here.”

“What time is it?”

“Now.”

“What are you?”

“This moment.”

This conversation in the movie The Peaceful Warrior reminds us to be live in the present moment. 

This Week’s Winning Post

5 Top Secret Habits to Boost Intelligence

See you next week!

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Question: What is it that can become simplified and yet expanded at the same time? 

Answer: The second edition of my book Thoughtfully Yours is here – expanded from 66 quotes to 99 quotes, and simplified in terms of fewer number of actionable questions that follow each quote. 

With an added benefit – all this at a reduced price than the previous edition (you can thank the publisher for this benefit). Check it out now by getting your copy here: http://ThoughtfullyYours.in/ 

Thoughtful Thought

“You don’t need to look serious in order to be taken seriously.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“After interviewing hundreds of people, I found out how people got over phobias. They all reached the point where they got fed up with being afraid.”- Richard Bandler

One Minute NLP – Association and Dissociation

Can you recall one happiest moment of your life? There are 2 ways in which you can actually experience the recall of that moment.

Scenario A – Experience this moment as if it is actually happening around you right now. See what you saw then… now, hear what you heard then… now, and feel what felt then… now. Be completely in the moment such that all you see, hear and feel is exactly happening around you right now.

Scenario B – Watch yourself experiencing that moment as if you are watching a movie – as if you are seeing yourself as a character in that movie. Notice what you (as that character) are seeing, hearing and feeling.

Now my question for you is: While recalling the happy moment, in which scenario did you actually feel the emotion of happiness more right now? – scenario A or scenario B?

For most people, the intensity of the emotion is stronger when recalled via scenario A rather than when recalled via scenario B. In NLP, Scenario A is called “association” and Scenario B is called “dissociation”

In the next episode, we shall discuss how you can use this awareness to your advantage in your life. Meanwhile, I invite you to share your thoughts – what do you think where can you use associated ways of recalling and where can you use dissociated ways of recalling?

Meta- Magic – Shake Off And Step Up

When a donkey fell into a deep pit, its owner decided to let go of it rather than expending the effort to rescue it. To save the donkey from the pain of dying out of starvation in the pit, the owner decided to bury the donkey by shoveling sand over it. With every scoop of sand, the man’s heart kept sinking. After a few minutes, with his tear-blurred eyes, the man was pleasantly astonished at what he saw – the donkey was simply shaking off the sand and using its own weight to step over it. As the sand level rose, the donkey rose with it. Finally the donkey surfaced up after stepping up on the tall pile of sand. It was his time to graze in the greens again.

My question to you is – Are you allowing yourself to get buried in the sand or are you choosing to shake off and step up?

Hook From The Book

“The hardest thing is not doing what you want – it’s knowing what you want”- The Almanack Of Naval Ravikant: A Guide to Wealth and Happiness by Eric Jorgenson

Movie Motivation

“Oh yes, the past can hurt. But you can either run from it, or learn from it.” This dialogue from The Lion King connects with the NLP principle that there is no failure, only feedback. What lessons are we learning from our past actions and inactions?

This Week’s Winning Post

And it is a hattrick – Grateful to be invited for the third consecutive time as a speaker at the Global NLP Summit again in 2024. Check out this year’s topic on this Instagram post 

See you next week!

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Thoughtful Thought

“Let your unhelpful habits sink like Titanic in the ocean of wisdom.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“After interviewing hundreds of people, I found out how people got over phobias. They all reached the point where they got fed up with being afraid.”- Richard Bandler

One Minute NLP – Meta Programs

“Why do I do what I do?”

“Why did not it click me before?”

“Where had I gone wrong?”

“How did I come to this conclusion?”

While we all have these questions mushrooming inside our head every now and then, we often fail to miss the roots of it. Why do we do what we do? – including the good and the not-so-good – META PROGRAMS in Neuro-Linguistic Programming has answers to it.

Meta Programs are advanced patterns of thinking that control what you perceive and how to change them. They are mental processes that manage, guide, and direct other mental processes. In other words, they are processes about or at a higher level than (meta to) the mental processes they affect.

You could compare them to a switchboard that controls which two telephones will be connected to each other for the process of having a conversation, or a thermostat that controls whether your air conditioning system is turned on or off. These are both metaphors for one system that controls another system. NLP uses a contemporary metaphor taken from computer science to describe the action of one process upon another – Programs.

It is often the case in computer programming, that one program controls the execution of several other programs, selects which ones will run at which times, and sends them the information they’ll need to function properly.

To sum up, it won’t be an exaggeration to say that matching your meta-programs will be equally as powerful as matching horoscopes.

Meta-Magic – What if…?

“It was January of 1960 & according to the prognosis, I had a winter and sprint and summer to live through and would die with the fall of the leaf.” These were the words of author Anthony Burgess who rose to fame in his 40’s.

Anthony was anxious after knowing his death estimate announced by his oncologists. ‘Brain Tumor’ was a dreadful word back then. Although the reason for his anxiety was NOT the duration he had to live, but the challenge of how he could make the most of that duration so he could leave a substantial financial back-up for his wife Lynne.

Writing novels sounded like a perfect recipe for joy and everlasting royalty income for his wife. He locked himself up for one whole year and made typewriter his best friend. With his focused energetic involvement, Anthony could write five and a half novels in just one year.

When the fall came, life surprised Anthony and his tumor was dissolved. He lived and produced masterpieces like A Clockwork Orange and 70 more novels after it.

We all have that Anthony in us, who has extraordinary hidden talent within.

My question to you is: What if you had just one year to live like Anthony? How would you make sure that you live your life differently to differentiate your living?

Hook From The Book

“If you go through the world looking for excellence, you will find excellence. If you go through the world looking for problems you will find problems. Or as the Arabic saying puts it: What a piece of bread looks like depends on whether you are hungry or not”- Joseph O’Connor, Introducing NLP: Psychological Skills for Understanding and Influencing People

Movie Motivation

“Itna mat soch… soch gehri ho jaaye, toh faisle kamzor ho jaate hai” (translated to “Don’t think so much. If the thinking becomes deeper, then the decision-making may become weaker.”) This dialogue from the movie Khuda Gawah reminds us to be aware of our overthinking mode. 

Here is the link to a blogpost I had written few years ago about 7 Ways to Overcome Overthinking

This Week’s Winning Post

The best gift for an author is the gratitude received from the readers. Here is the link to the heart-winning post.

See you next week!

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria