Welcome to the 55th episode of NLP Around YOU!

Thoughtful Thought

“To listen is not to just HEAR. It is to be HERE.” – Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“Wisdom comes from experience, but experience is not enough. Experience anticipated and experience revisited is the true source of wisdom.”- John Grinder

One Minute NLP – Ecology Frame

Our actions are akin to atom bombs, their impact reverberating throughout the environment and energy fields. Each action creates a chain reaction, influencing other aspects of our lives and surroundings. Being in an ecology frame enables us to consider the broader context evaluating how our actions resonate with our values and intersect with various facets of our life. Some questions to ponder can be: does this align with my values, or does it create conflict? How might it ripple through my other roles and responsibilities? While the impact could be positive or negative, the process of calibration is essential for navigating these complexities.

For example, When you read NLP Around You, what areas of your life are getting impacted?

Meta-Magic – The Bank Account of Life Lessons

Dreaming of a flourishing and evergreen bank account is a common aspiration, isn’t it? But how many of us truly achieve it? Now, imagine possessing such an account that credits $86,400 into your balance every single day. Astonishing, isn’t it? Well, there’s just one catch. You are required to utilise those $86,400 each day, otherwise, by nightfall, the balance resets to zero daily – regardless of whether you spend it or not. The next day, you receive a fresh credit of $86,400 in your account. In such a scenario, what would you do with the daily inflow of $86,400? Would you allow that credit to get expired unutilised? More importantly, what if I tell you that we all possess such an account? Yes, that account is known as ‘Time’.

Each day, we receive a deposit of 86,400 seconds, and the entire unused balance gets expired without any possibility of overdraft, carryover, or borrowing. Whether we utilise it or not, the clock resets at the beginning of each day.

So, my question to you is: Are you using your bank balance wisely and fully?

Hook From The Book

“We can’t have change without loss, which is why so often people say they want change but nonetheless stay exactly the same.” ― Lori Gottlieb, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

Movie Motivation

“Raaste ki parwah karoonga toh Manzil bura maan jayegi.” (translated to “If I think too much about the roads, my destination will feel bad.”) This quote from the movie Once Upon A Time in Mumbai reminds us to stay focused on the goal (destination) while being flexible about exploring the pathways that lead to the goal.

This Week’s Winning Post

What if Creativity was a magic potion (blog post)

A Special Invite for You and Your Loved Ones:

You are invited to the NLP Foundation Weekend scheduled on 13th and 14th April 2024 – a dive into the world of NLP conducted online from 7 am to 10 am on both the days. Here is your special link to register for this complimentary offer now.

https://www.w3successacademy.com/f/nlp-foundation-2024

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Thoughtful Thought

“There might be commas in your growth, but never a full stop in your learning.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“Every problem is a gift – without problems we would not grow.” ― Anthony Robbins

One Minute NLP – As If Frame

What kind of person will you become once you implement all the learnings from this newsletter, NLP Around You? What will you see, hear, and feel differently in your day-to-day life after implementing what you read here?

Asking such questions shifts your mind to ‘As If Frame’, where you think and visualise as if the situation has already happened. Now really close your eyes and answer the above question mentally. I am sure that you will feel motivated, and you might pick up the previous newsletter editions and re-visit them to implement several things from there, right?

By harnessing the power of the As-If Frame, you are taking control of your mind’s programming. These frames shift perspectives and bring a new level of clarity to your life.

Consider the impact of the As-If Frame on students preparing for exams. The potential for a drastic shift in their mindset and performance is within reach.

To sum up, What would your life be like if you used As-If Frame wisely?

Meta-Magic- What Are You Serving To Others?

When Gautam Buddha visited a village renowned for its monks, a vast number of people cancelled their pre-scheduled meetings with the monks so that they could see him instead. While most of the monks took this in their stride and made their way to meet Buddha, Vishwajeet stood out, his expression dark and his anger palpable.

“I must teach this Buddha a lesson,” he muttered through clenched teeth. “Because of him, I missed my meeting with my disciples today.” His eyebrows knitted together in fury as he made his way towards where Buddha was set to speak.

“You! You shameless person!” Vishwajeet’s voice boomed with rage as he confronted Buddha. “Because of you, all the other monks have been insulted, and their disciples stolen. You are heartless and stupid!” His eyes blazed with fury, and his entire body trembled with anger.

Meanwhile, Buddha remained seated calmly, seemingly unperturbed, which only served to stoke Vishwajeet’s fiery temper. His insults grew darker and more venomous with each passing moment. Finally, when Buddha was asked for a response, he simply smiled and said, “Tell me, my friend, when guests visit your home, do you turn them away or welcome them?”

Taken aback by the seemingly irrelevant question, Vishwajeet replied, “Of course, I welcome them. I invite them in and offer them food.”

Buddha’s smile widened as he continued, “And if they graciously decline that food, to whom does it belong?”

“Obviously it belongs to the host, to me,” Vishwajeet answered, his impatience evident in his fidgeting hands.

Buddha chuckled softly and added, “You served me anger, and I chose not to accept it. Therefore, it returns to you, leaving you even more enraged, frustrated, and unhappy. Who is truly harmed in this situation, you or I? If you wish to rid yourself of this anger, start serving love instead, and it will inevitably return to you.”

My question to you: What are YOU serving others today?

Hook From The Book

“He who has learned to disagree without being disagreeable has discovered the most valuable secret of negotiation.” ― Chris Voss, Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It

Movie Motivation

“Main udna chahta hoon, daudna chahta hoon, girna bhi chahta hoon… bas rukna nahin chahta.” (translated to “I want to fly, I want to run, I also want to fall… I just don’t want to stop”). This dialogue from yeh Jawani Hai Deewani acts as a reminder for us to keep progressing and moving ahead, and that falling is not failing.

This Week’s Winning Post

The Equations of Emotions

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Thoughtful Thought

“Success is about walking the path forward not about worrying on potholes.” ― Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“It is your decisions, and not your conditions, that determine your destiny.” ― Tony Robbins

One Minute NLP – Open Frame

Have you tried changing the frame of an old photo to make it look all fresh? What if you could do the same with various situations in life? Well, NLP has another tool in its armoury to give you a magic spell and it is known as ‘FRAMES’. These frames shift our perspective and make us look at some issue with different eyes.

Open Frame is one of the frames which enables us to satiate our curiosity by asking questions or providing comments about the topic under discussion. It is like an open book, where you can flip to any page. It opens the horizons of opportunities for individuals to raise questions on whatever interests them.

This frame also boosts rapport building through the act of inclusion. Open frame empowers both sides of the party. It unfolds the unseen and unexplored through questions. For example: asking during a weekly team meeting “How was the week for you?”

Meta-Magic – Can You See Yourself Where You Want To Be?

A devoted disciple, Srini was in a dilemma when his archery mentor invited him once again to observe his bow practice. On one hand, his heart swelled with joy, knowing his master’s eagerness to impart every skill, having already asked Srini to accompany him countless times. On the other hand, his mind clashed with his heart, whispering rebellious thoughts – “What new will you learn today when you’ve witnessed it a hundred times before?”

Srini quietened his mind and followed his master’s lead. Upon arrival, the master set up his bow and arrow, placing a sunflower between the branches of a tree. “Hmm, so just the flower has changed this time,” Srini mused.

Suddenly, the master shifted gears, retrieving a black blindfold from his pocket and covering his eyes. Srini’s eyes sparkled in anticipation of witnessing his master’s grand performance.

The master took a deep breath and released the arrow from nearly 200 meters away. Serenity graced his face.

“My dear Srini, can you go and check whether the flower has been struck precisely?”

When Srini went, his heart sank as he could not spot any arrow on the flower. Breathing deeply, he scanned the entire tree meticulously, but the arrow was nowhere to be found. His mind raced with apprehension about revealing the truth to the master.

Upon returning to the master, he wondered how to convey that the arrow had missed its mark. The master waited, smiling, his eyes twinkling.

“My dear master, I don’t know how to tell you this, but I could not locate an arrow on the flower or the entire tree. I suspect you overshot it far ahead.” Srini’s voice softened to a murmur, not wanting to disappoint his master.

Srini assumed his answer would extinguish the shine in his master’s eyes, but to his surprise, the master’s face softened even more as if a mystery awaited unravelling.

“Master, I don’t understand. I thought you brought me here to witness the power of setting a goal and achieving it through self-belief?”

“Yes, Srini, you are correct. I wanted to show you the power of goal-setting. The number one lesson in goal-setting is this – if you cannot see your goal, you cannot attain it.”

My question: Do you see yourself there before reaching there?

Hook From The Book

“If you want to know the strength of a cloth, you inspect the quality of its weave. If you want to understand a person’s character, look closely at their interpersonal behaviour or their transactions.”
― Amish Tripathi, The Immortals of Meluha

Movie Motivation

“It is not our abilities that show what we truly are. It is our choices.” When Albus Dumbledore speaks, the world remembers. This famous dialogue from Harry Potter series reminds us that life is not about the chances you miss, but the choices you make. While we have the ability to choose, that ability is of no use if we choose not to choose.

This Week’s Winning Post

How to Measure Success

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Thoughtful Thought

“The success of your organization system is measured by the ease of retrieval when needed.”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner 

“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.” ― Virginia Satir

One Minute NLP- Future Pacing

Imagine being transported to a tranquil beach, where the warm sunshine caresses your toes, inviting them to wiggle with delight. The fresh sea breeze cleanses your soul, and you inhale deeply, embracing the serenity that surrounds you. In that moment, all worries fade away, and the gentle rhythm of the waves whispers songs of hope, making everything seem possible. You rise with the energy of the high tide, swaying in harmony with the abundant breeze that envelops you.

How often and for how long would you like to immerse yourself in such an experience, where you can dance to the melodies of abundance? A place where ease reigns supreme, free from the clutches of toxicity, and passion lingers in the air, ready to embrace you fully and eternally.

You can use this script to transport yourself to this idyllic beach whenever you feel the weight of stress upon your shoulders. Consider it a magic wand, a time machine that whisks away your worries and nurtures your wholesomeness and authenticity.

In the realm of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, this powerful technique is known as Future Pacing. A very powerful application of Future Pacing lies in experiencing the achievement of your goals, or experiencing the desired mental states, or changing your habits or behaviour. With Future Pacing, you can reignite your inner motivation and passion by visualizing yourself in that desired situation, place, or state. It fosters self-belief in your own capabilities and unlocks the path to seamless achievement.

Meta-Magic – Can You See The Wonder?

“Hey Dad, look! The trees are moving past us!” exclaimed 24-year-old James, his eyes sparkling with wonder. His father, Peter, beamed with a smile that radiated pure joy and love.

Across from them on the train, a young couple glanced at Peter with a hint of pity, taken aback by James’s childlike excitement.

“Oh, wow! Dad, the clouds are racing alongside us!” James squealed in delight. The young couple exchanged a puzzled glance, unable to resist asking Peter, “Forgive me for inquiring, but have you considered seeking medical attention for your son?”

Peter’s smile only broadened as he replied, “In fact, we are returning from the doctor’s office. Today marks a new beginning for him. He’s just undergone an eye surgery and has gained his eyesight for the first time since childhood.”

My question to you is: How do you perceive the world and those around you? Through eyes jaded by experience, or with the fresh wonder of new sight?

Hook From The Book

“It’s like Tolstoy said. Happiness is an allegory, unhappiness a story.”
― Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

Movie Motivation

“Life is not the amount of breaths you take, it’s the moments that take your breath away.” How do you relate to this famous quote from the movie Hitch?

This Week’s Winning Post 

Have you sailed in metaphorical boats?

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

Thoughtful Thought

“Destiny is not in the stars, but in the decisions”- Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“Life is not the way it’s supposed to be, it’s the way it is. The way you cope with that is what makes the difference.” ― Virginia Satir

One Minute NLP – The Red Flag of Goal Setting

The story shared by Curly Martin in her book The Business Coaching Handbook gives an interesting insight into the process of goal getting vs goal setting.

Nigel thought he had a job for life when he landed a part in Britain’s longest running television soap opera. Then, to boost viewing figures, the producer decided that his character would meet a gruesome and dramatic end.

At first Nigel welcomed the break from the punishing daily rehearsal and filming pattern. He still had a lifestyle that matched his former income but his savings quickly evaporated. To maintain his public image, he borrowed money and drifted ever deeper into debt. An avalanche of bills that he could not pay presented him with his wake-up call.

He remembered a book that another cast member had given him to read in his dressing room between takes. It was about goal setting. Without reference to the book, he decided there and then to set himself this goal: “Six months from today, I am totally debt-free.“

Exactly six months later he was forced into bankruptcy. This is the ultimate debt-free state. He had achieved his goal, but it was not what he had in mind when he wrote it.

Meta-Magic – What would you choose over a Sundae?

“How much is this delightful ice cream sundae?” asked 9-year-old John, his eyes dancing with delight as he took in the vibrant array of ice cream colors.

“50 cents,” the waitress replied, while scanning John’s appearance. His ruffled hair, grease-stained hands and clothes, and well-worn outfit told her he must have just come from the garage. “Probably earned a few cents washing a car,” she mused.

John began carefully counting the coins in his pocket. Once finished, he let out a small sigh and surveyed the counter again. “Um, how much is a plain ice cream?”

“35 cents,” the waitress said, wiping the counter.

“Okay, I’ll have a plain ice cream, please.” John handed over his 35 cents and waited eagerly for his treat to arrive at the table.

When John left, the waitress came to clear the table, and what she found opened her eyes wide.

There, left by little John, was a 15-cent tip for her.

Little John had chosen kindness over an ice cream sundae. What would you choose?

Hook From The Book

“Why should I have a time problem?” the little Buddha asked in astonishment. “There is enough time. What matters is what you do with it.” – Little Buddha Finding Happiness by Claus Mikosch

Movie Motivation

“Oh yes, the past can hurt. But from the way I see it, you can either run from it, or learn from it.” This quote from The Lion King reminds us that the past is our learning ground to reflect and decide our way forward in life.

This Week’s Winning Post

Revealed: The Secret Recipe of Swishing from Mundane to Magic

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh

To begin with, I am overjoyed to share 2 announcements with you.

Here is the first one – My blog https://w3coach.com/blog has been listed among the 25 Best Indian Life Coach Blogs and Websites in 2024 by Feedspot. Check out the link here: https://lifestyle.feedspot.com/indian_life_coach_blogs/?feedid=5665645

For the second announcement, just keep the curiosity alive till you scroll till the end of this newsletter.

Thoughtful Thought

“You are most beautiful when you be you to the full.” – Dr Mehernosh J Randeria

NLP Quote Corner

“Awareness in and of itself is curative.”– Fritz Perls

One Minute NLP – Coaching with Chunking

Neuro-Linguistic Programming is a transformative tool that is applicable in the field of coaching and counselling.

Chunking is one such technique that can sketch revolutionary breakthroughs in a client seeking coaching or counselling.

Chunking in NLP is like the game of Tetris, where the objects are smartly navigated in order to fit into the structure. In Chunking, the questions need to be tweaked in a way that the ideas fit into the structure of clarity. One can ask questions to get either a broader or a narrowed view of any topic.

E.g. 1: Chunking up (Generalisation)

A: I just can’t write anything well. I tried, it never works.

B: Wow! Nothing at all? Not even your name?

A: I mean reports.

E.g. 2: Chunking Down (Specification)

A: Writing is very frustrating. I can’t write at all.

B: Which part of writing is frustrating to you? Ideation, outline, typing on keyboard, formatting etc?

A: Hmm! I can’t seem to organize my ideas.

So next time when you put the coach hat on, don’t forget to add chunking as a feather in it.

Meta-Magic – Fishing for Possibilities

A freshly recruited salesman in a departmental store in Canada was approached by his boss at the closing hours of his first day at work.

Boss: “How many sales did you make on the first day?”

Salesman: “Sir, I attended to 1 Sales call.”

Boss: “Only one sale the whole day? Usually, every salesman here does 20 to 30 Sales transactions a day. Well, tell me what is the value of your today’s one sale?”

Salesman: “$93300….!”

Boss: “What?? Unbelievable! But how did you do that?”

Salesman: “Sir, one customer came in, and I sold him a small fishing hook. Then a mazola, and then finally sold a big hook. Then I sold him one big fishing rod and some fishing gear…”

“Then I asked him where he goes to catch fish and he said to the coastal area….”

“Then I said to him that he would need a boat. So I took him to the boat department and sold him a 20 ft double engine scooter boat.”

“When he said the boat won’t come in his Volkswagen, I took him to the automobile section and sold him the new Deluxe 4×4 blazer to carry the boat.”

“And when I asked him where he would be going fishing ??? He didn’t plan anything. So I took him to the camping section and sold him a six-sleeper camper tent.”

“And then he took groceries worth $200 and 2 cases of beer….!”

Now the boss took two steps back and asked:- “You sold all this to a person who came just to buy only 1 fish hook???”

Salesman: “NO, Sir… He actually came in to buy one tablet for his headache… I explained to him that ‘Fishing’ is the best way to get rid of headaches!!”

My question to you is – How do you relate to this story? In which areas of your life can you create more possibilities out of situations that appear to look like limitations?

Hook From The Book

“The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations.” ― Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, We Should All Be Feminists

Movie Motivation

“Success ke peechhe mat bhaago. Kaabil bano kaabil. Kaamyaabi to saali jhak maarke peechhe aayegi.” (translated to “Do not chase Success. Work on your capabilities. Success is bound to follow.”) This line from the movie 3 Idiots reminds us to pursue Excellence and Work on self-development and growth so that success can follow by default.

This Week’s Winning Post

The Gift of “Extra”: Why Leap Day is Your Secret Weapon

So, here is the second big announcement – what you have just read is the 50th episode of this newsletter “NLP Around You”. Thanks to your love and support, I have consistently delivered to your expectations and beyond for 50 consecutive weeks. On this occasion, I am publishing a special blog post this coming Monday regarding the lessons I have learnt from the power of consistency and how you can apply these in your life, too. Remember to subscribe to my blog at https://w3coach.com/blog to be the first to receive it in your email inbox.

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria