What Type of Light Bulb Are You?

by | Apr 15, 2023 | NLP Around You | 0 comments

While life is a box of chocolates, one of my favourite chocolates is this newsletter, which I relish writing. While every newsletter re-energizes me, I would love to know, how it has made a space in the chocolate box of your life too.

Thoughtful Thought of the Week

Once you understand the language of your mind, you learn how to mind your language.” – Mehernosh Randeria, Thoughtfully Yours

NLP Quote Corner

People wait for something to happen in order to be happy. The key is to be happy regardless.” – Richard Bandler

One Minute NLP

The Map is not the Territory

One of the presuppositions of NLP, “The map is not the territory” is used to describe the difference between our subjective perception of reality and the objective reality itself.

In essence, this presupposition means that our perception of the world is not the same as the world itself, and our understanding of reality is filtered through our individual experiences, beliefs, and biases. Therefore, the language and thoughts we use to describe reality are just representations of that reality, and they may not accurately reflect the objective truth.

For instance, if you are in a business meeting and trying to convey an idea to your colleagues, it’s important to understand that your understanding of the idea might be different from theirs, due to their own individual filters. This presupposition reminds us that effective communication involves acknowledging and respecting the differences in each person’s subjective reality, and working towards a shared understanding of the objective reality.

When two people are arguing over a certain issue, struggling to express their respective points of view, both are actually representing their respective maps of the territory. So, the million-dollar question is: if these are two different maps, how can we get to the actual territory? If we invite a third person to verify the facts, do we get the territory? No. What you get now is a third map.


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Rony, a hardworking corporate employee, approached his retired mentor Arjuna: “I have always followed your advice to keep working in silence and let success make the noise. While this has helped me to learn, all promotions are given to other guys who don’t even have my experience or capabilities.”

Arjuna wondered, “hmm, have you ever taken leave from work?”

“No. Never, Sir.” Rony replied, “In fact, I am the most regular employee of the company.”

The wise old Arjuna advised “You must request a day off. It’s time for you to give yourself a break.”

Though surprised, Rony left quickly to act upon his mentor’s advice. When he returned to work after his day off, his manager informed him that regular work had suffered in his absence, as others had no idea how to handle the problems. Realizing his importance, the manager promoted him.

Rony thought that he had discovered the secret to success, and started using this strategy every now and then.

One day, much to his shock Rony found out that his employment was terminated. He immediately rushed back to see his mentor with confusion and wounded pride, and asked “Did I not do everything as you instructed?”

“Actually you did not. Because you heard only half the lesson. You understood right away that no one pays any attention to a light bulb that’s always on. It is only when it goes off that people suddenly take notice and realize they’ve been taking it for granted.

The mentor continued slowly to make his point. “The second half, more important than the first, is the realization, that if the light bulb goes off frequently, it will be replaced with one that is more reliable.”

My question to you is:

What kind of lightbulb are you? The one that never switches off? Or the one that keeps a balance between switching off and being lit?

Hook from a Book

“The difference between faith and trust is profound. For example, we can have faith that things will work out, or that a friend will come through for us, but we may still be plagued by worry and moments of doubt. When we have trust, however, negative thoughts do not fill our mind. We do not dwell on or worry about the outcome. Trust is an intellectual process, a natural outgrowth of an unblemished record.”

– Mind Reader by David Lieberman

Movie Motivation

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“Bade bade deshon mein aisi chhoti chhoti baatein hoti rehti hai, Senorita” – from Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jaayege. Literally translated, “In big big countries, small small things like these keep happening”, reminds us not to sweat over the small stuff. In life, are we giving undue importance to petty things? Because energy flows where focus goes.

Weekly Winner Posts

One of the highest interactive posts this week is on Emotional Regulation. Make sure to check it out and share your comments too:


See you next week

Thank you for your overwhelming response to this series. Keep sharing your thoughts on email, and feel free to invite your family and friends to be part of “NLP Around You” by simply sharing this link with them now: http://nlparoundyou.com/

Thoughtfully Yours,

Mehernosh Randeria

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